What do you do when your little one seems a bit down in the dumps?  Saying, 'Cheer up', 'Stop being so moody', etc. certainly doesn't help.  With little ones, its best to do something to lift the mood.  Here are a few tips for getting little ones to perk up!  You'll probably find you all end up having fun!

Make an observation and give out a bit of praise. Get them to do a picture and say how great it is. Praise them for something good they have done.  It can work wonders.

Wash away the bad mood - if its sunny go outside and using a hose or a spray or a watering can, wash away the moodiness.  Have a giggle while you wash and use some bubbles too!

Simply ask what's wrong - if they can tell you try and get them to explain why they seem unhappy.  See if it's something you can help with.

Go for a run around the park or garden - Scoop your child up, put on some trainers and head off for a windy walk and a run in the park.  Or go out in the garden for a wild run around, some chasing, a bit of high spirited screaming and giggling.  It will do you all the world of good!

Think of things - ... that you love, that you like doing, that you like playing.  Act them out, have a laugh as you try and enjoy yourselves.  You will see the mood lifting!

Put on some music - dance your troubles away!  Have a boogie and have some fun!

Toddlers and pre-schoolers are for ever playing around the place and one day will inevitably get themselves a splinter.  Most can be brushed away or removed with a pair of tweezers or long finger nails.  However, if it needs a bit more attention, here are some pointers.

1. If it's sticking out - Sterilize a pair of tweezers and wash your hands before you start.  Give lots of encouragement and reassurance to your child.  Try and get hold of the splinter at the base (where it comes out of the skin) hold tightly and pull out.  If it doesn't come out easily, don't force it as it might break and remain inside.
2. If it's not sticking out or has broken inside - Sterilise a needle with a flame and cool.  Soak the area in warm water, and use the needle to create a slit in the skin and carefully remove the splinter.  It won't hurt, but the idea of it may scare your child, so give lots of encouragement and perhaps get someone to help hold your child still while you do it.
3. If it's a big one! - If it's big, or curved, or glass you should take your child to the doctor.
4. If it's a little one - You may find that leaving the splinter alone it will eventually work loose and fall out itself.  Try washing in warm water a few times a day.

If it gets infected

If it seems swollen, red or pussy, you must take your child to the doctor and make sure that your child's immunisations are up to date.

How to prevent splinters

• Make sure your child keeps shoes on in the garden and wears slippers indoors if you have wooden floors.
• If you break a glass use a vacuum and clear up all the tiny fragments carefully.
• Keep away from garden sheds and any other wooden items in the garden that are not sanded down.
• Be aware of wooden edges to pathways or climbing equipment at the playground that may be damaged.

Whilst a splinter can be rather painful, most of the time the pain subsides as soon as the foreign body has been extracted.  Take care.

Could it be that some children born happy while others not?  Some children certainly seem happier than others even if they come from the same family, so can it be that some children are going to be happy from day one and others will always be moodier or more inclined to be unhappy?

If they fall over, some children laugh and others burst into floods of tears.  When they wake up, some laugh at the sunny morning and jump out of bed.  Others turn over in a moody shrug.  If they don't get their own way some get stroppy and remain miserable for hours.  Others just move on to the next activity and forget about it.  Why is this?

Some scientists would say that yes, some children do have a tendency to be happier than other children.  However, it cannot be proved beyond doubt.  Wherever your child is on the happy/sad spectrum, the important thing is to be aware of how they might respond in certain situations and react accordingly.

Child psychologist Dr. Lise Eliot, Associate Professor in the Department of Neuroscience at the Chicago Medical School, maintains that happiness is a state of mind, a mood, rather than an inborn trait.  However, certain aspects of a baby's temperament (shy or bold for example) will play a role in determining how happy they are.  And, it is this emotional information that is embedded in the brain.

This doesn't mean to say that if your little one is scared of going to pre-school, or nervous of new people that they will be unhappy later in life.  Not at all.  In fact nature and nurture play an equally important role in the first years of a child's life.  Just because a baby's temperament (confident or reserved) may be determined by nature, it doesn't mean it's permanent.  Nurture plays a very important role too and those early traits can be modified and honed down with careful parenting.  The end result is personality... a blend of the two.

Personality is controlled by the frontal lobe of the brain.  We feel good things in the left frontal cortex and bad things in the right, according to scientists. It is said that people with happier dispositions have more activity in their left frontal lobe.

So, spot any signs of unhappy tendencies and deal with them.  Support a nervous child; try to tame a bold child; nurture a nervous child and try to guide them to be rounded, happy and creative individuals.

Going out to dinner with your children needn't leave you with indigestion; before we had children, many of us used to watch in horror as parents struggled with their children, shouting at them to sit down and force-feeding them with food they refused to eat. Perhaps worse, we watched as they just let the children run riot in the restaurant and did nothing!

You don't need to turn into one of those embarrassed parents when it comes to taking your children, however little, out to dine. If you take the time to follow a few tips, you will be the proudest parent as they sit and eat nicely.

So make it easy on them (and you!) by bearing in mind these pointers:

• Choose an appropriate restaurant especially if its your first time out.
• Make sure there is a menufor the kids.
• Take along any special juice cups, or small cutlery if this will make it easier and more familiar for your little one.
• Take along plastic plates if you fear the restaurant crockery may end up on the floor!  Plastic is quieter and less likely to draw attention if it falls and it will not result in a stroppy waiter having to clear up broken china.
• Check there is something that your child likes on the menu before you book.
• Try not to use a restaurant as a place to experiment with new flavours - unless your child is used to this.
• Don't eat too late or arrive at the time when your child usually eats. Bare in mind it may take some tome to get a table, settle quickly and have the food ordered and served.  Although being hungry is useful, you don't want them screaming for sustenance! So, eat early to avoid any meltdowns!
• Take colouring books/crayons (that don't stain so no felt pens!) to amuse them. Draw your dinner, or the waiter's face! Even use paper napkins if you like.
• Take some small toys (that sit neatly on a table) in case there is a wait.
• Request a corner or edge table rather than one right in the middle of the room so as not to draw attention to yourselves.
• Ask for plenty of napkins ready to mop up any spills or dribbles!
• When you are seated, hand over any wine glasses, ornamental candles or anything that could cause your little one to reach and pull...just in case!
• Try and visit the toilet before you start eating so you avoid interrupting your meal.
• Don't stay too long and push them too far! If they are used to a quick meal, don't expect them to languish for hours!
• Have a test run! If you are out for an important meal, then have a test run in a coffee shop or supermarket café before hand. Get used to the idea of waiting, of sitting and of eating in a strange place.
• Don't be too hard on them, but make it clear you expect them to behave.

Enjoy!

It is estimated that the cohort of students starting university this autumn will leave with debts of £25,000 - whether you want your little ones to go to university or not, there are plenty of other expenses that you can start saving for as soon as they are born!

Bringing up children costs money; yes there are shortcuts that you can take, you don't have to go on the most glamorous foreign holidays or buy the most expensive clothes, but by planning for the future and putting a little money aside each month, you can build up a fund to help towards their future. You may want to save towards their first car, their wedding, university education or their first house.

Child Trust Funds were a good starting point to encourage parents to start saving for their children. Unfortunately these are being axed, but there's nothing to stop you opening a savings account and making a monthly contribution no matter how small. After a few years you will have a fund that anyone should be grateful for, or that you can use to cover some of the more significant costs that might come your way!

Road safety is one of the most important topics that we can train our children on - cars and roads are so dangerouss for young children, but teaching them from an early age will help them to treat the highway code with respect.  Here are some stark facts about road safety:

• 161 children died on the road in 2006
  
• 26,000,000 cars are on our roads

Car speed:

• If a child is hit by a car driving at 40 mph most die.
• If a child is hit by a car driving at 30 mph half die.
• If a child is hit by a car driving at 20 mph one child in 20 will die.

Teach children early how to cross the road in six steps:

1. Think - look for a subway or crossing first.  Don't cross on a bend.
2. Stop - choose a good place to cross, stand on the kerb, away from parked cars and other obstructions
3. Look And Listen - look in all directions and listen carefully
4. Wait - until its safe to cross
5. Cross carefully - looking and listening as you go
6. Arrive safely

Make sure you show them while you tell them and also ensure you follow these rules yourself when crossing.

Teach your child some other points:

• Walk - don't run and stick to pavements when you can.  If there is no pavement, walk on the right side of the road so you see the approaching traffic.  Walk  in single file
• Parked Cars - don't cross between parked cars.  It makes your view of the road less clear
• Balls - don't run into the road to chase a lost ball, or indeed any other toy or object
• Gates - keep garden gates shut in case the children are running and run out unexpectedly
• Catch-up - never run into the road or along the pavement to catch up a friend who is in front of you

You may not have your own pets, but at some point you and your children are likely to come into contact with other people's pets.  Even if you don't own a dog or cat, here are a few ground rules to set out for your children to ensure they are safe and calm around other people's animals.

Don't...

1. Don't encourage small children, not familiar with animals, to handle pets by themselves without supervision
2. Don't allow them to hit or shout at an animal.  Teach them respect and show them how to speak to the animals in a calm and sensible voice.
3. Don't allow children to disturb dogs or cats (or indeed any animals) when they are sleeping, feeding, or playing alone.  Animals need quiet time too, so they should be left alone sometimes.
4. Don't let animals lick children's faces (or indeed let children lick or kiss animals' faces.)  Just think about what they lick to keep clean!
5. Don't let children feed pets with their food ie. sweets, chocolate etc!

Do...

1. Double check that the animals you visit have been wormed and checked over for fleas.  It may be embarrassing to ask, but it's worth it to know for sure!
2. Insist on washing children's hands ofter playing with or handling animals, especially if cleaning out cages!
3. Show your child how to approach, speak to and address with animals.  Don't just tell them... show them so they can see for themselves.
4. Explain that animals may not want to do what the children want them to do and have an opinion of their own.

Most adults need at least five hours of uninterrupted sleep every 24 hours in order to function properly and some need as much as eight hours, but new parents, research shows, get less than four hours sleep each night because of disturbances created by their children.  This major deficit in sleep required to function properly can lead to mood swings, depression, arguments and even break-ups.

As many as 12% of parents get less than 2.5 hours sleep per night.  1,000 parents were questioned to mark national Love Your Bed week.  It does seems unfair that a side effect of being a new parent renders you unfit to actually be a new parent by making you into a confused, exhausted person existing in a sleep-walking state.

Sleep Deprivation Symptoms

• Sleep derivation can leave you feeling disorientated, confused and irritable.
• It can effect your work and home life and indeed your feelings towards your baby because you blame them for your lack of sleep.
• It can be more difficult to handle stress or emotions and make you more clumsy and accident-prone.
• It can result in weight gain as the metabolism changes and appetite can be altered.
• Over time the immune system becomes less efficient making you prone to illness.

Coping with lack of sleep

Cat nap - take cat naps when ever you can during the day.  Ensure the baby is safe or get someone to come and look after baby while you take a rest.  Avoid napping in the evening as this may interrupt your sleep pattern.

Cure for lack of sleep

There is only one: get some sleep!

Reading to your little ones is such an important activity, but the youngest children will only pick out sounds that they are beginning to understand as words.  The act of reading to them allows them to hear words over and over and slowly they will begin to distinguish the different words.  In time, they will learn their meaning.  In no time at all you'll have a preschooler who has a broad vocabulary, understanding thousands of words.

To encourage hearing and learning words, you can make reading fun by asking questions at the end of each page as you read to them.  Read each page to your children and then ask them questions specific to what is happening in the pictures or the story.  If you are reading to several children then make sure they all get a turn, and ask questions appropriate to their age and understanding.  Your children will begin to widen their vocabulary, hearing the words repeated in a similar context.  Make sure that even the youngest are asked their own question, even if it is as simple as 'Where is the sky?', 'Point to something that is red', or 'What animal goes [suitable animal noise]?!'.

Reading to your little ones is one of the most valuable exercises you can undertake during their first few years.  Encourage a passion for reading and books and their learning will become so much easier later on.  The more you can create an interest in books by making stories interesting and fun, then the better in the longer term for your little ones!

It seems that three-wheeler buggies are out of fashion - at one time they were the ultimate accessory for celebrity families and trendy Mums, but is it still the case?  Industry figures show that that sales of the three-wheelers have fallen by 12% over the last 12 months.  This is not because births have fallen, but because the more traditional four-wheeler buggies have seen a 23% increase in sales.

During the early 2000's, the three-wheelers were the envy of many the parents pushing the traditional four-wheelers.  They looked quirky, they seemed modern and fashionable, they seemed to handle well and the babies always looked fine in them.  But they cost a whopping £600!

All those who suffered a bit of pram envy can now relax as it seems the three-wheelers were not every mummies dream chariot.  It has been reported that they were cumbersome, difficult to get on and off public transport, and that even folded they took up lots of space.

It seems that three-wheelers was a phase that has now passed.  Four-wheelers are back on the wish list as they are he preferred option for many parents.

A sales rep from Tesco said that sales of three-wheelers were dropping while a rep from John Lewis said they were still growing, but that four-wheelers were growing more.

Phil and Ted's, a leading supplier of three-wheelers, said that sales are still strong.

So, who knows?  Just opt for a buggy that you like the feel of, that's not too heavy to manoeuver, that will fit on you car or the space you wish to store it... oh yes, and that is comfortable for the baby who must suffer it!

The sound of a baby laughing is addictive and for many babies, and their parents too, being tickled is the funniest thing in the world - but do they really enjoy it?

When we are tickled, it is not 'real' laughter.  Research has shown that when we are tickled, it is not the same as proper laughter brought on when something is funny.  Unlike real laughter, tickling does not  prime us for more laughter like a series of jokes might.  Comics have a warm-up act to get us laughing; once we've started laughing, we're more inclined inclined to laugh at the main act that follows.  But tickling does not have this effect and does not set us up for more laughter.  Instead, it is just the outward appearance of pleasure without the actual pleasurable feeling.

A few studies have shown that babies are actually uncomfortable with tickling both behaviourally and psychologically. They fuss and show increased heart rate.  Some researchers have said that there is no positive data on tickling and that parents should not tickle at all!  However, babies are good at communicating dislike and surely if they were not enjoying the tickling, they would let us know with a cry or a scream?  Some say that tickling is an important part of bonding between parent and child. It's the beginning of forming social relationships.  Their laughter encourages us to continue tickling, so we should.

So perhaps we should tickle a bit, bond a bit, laugh a bit and remember that it might be more fun for us than them, so keep it to an acceptable level!

Parenting expert, Peneolope Leach, has said that leaving a baby to cry is potentially damaging - if a baby is left to cry on a regular basis it could be damaging to the developing baby.  These claims are made in her book, The Essential First Year, published earlier this year.  This is, of course, in total contrast to the work of Gina Ford, who claims that parents should leave a baby crying, so to teach them to settle themselves.

Leach has used saliva swabs to measure the level of the stress hormone cortisol in crying babies who get no comfort from their parents.  Leach claims that neurobiologists say these hormones are toxic to the developing brain and therefore maintains that it is fact, and not opinion, that it is damaging.

She admits that all babies cry, and agrees that some cry more than others.  However she maintains that in the first year, babies cry to get a response and by parents ignoring this effort to communicate, and elicit a response, they are risking long term consequences. She says babies cry for a reason, their lungs are not just needing exercise!  She also states that babies are not capable of fooling their parents or "blackmail" in the first 18 months so a cry is there for a reason.

Leach is an honorary senior researcher fellow at the Tavistock Clinic and the Institute for the Study of Children, Family and Social Issues. 

Although English is the predominant language of the UK, there are several minority languages spoken in different regions and it's possible to find nurseries that teach those languages from an early age. The other native languages spoken in the UK are:-

• Welsh
• Scottish Gaelic
• Scots
• Irish
• Ulster Scots
• Cornish

These languages are recognised in UK law and recognised by the European Charter for Regional or Minority Languages.  In Wales, the Welsh National Assembly afford equal status to Welsh and English in official publications and signage.  Strangely enough, the English language isn't declared constitutionally as the language of the UK, it only enjoys its status on the grounds that that is what the majority of the population speak!

If you live in a region where a minority language is spoken and want your children to be learn it then you will be able to find local nurseries and other groups to join that promote these languages.  As with learning a foreign language at home, you should aim to speak the language to your children as well so that they gain wider exposure to it and can learn it more easily.  Indeed, you may choose only to use the minority language in the domestic setting and have them learn English outside of the home.

How do babies and toddlers learn to speak and acquire the knowledge to form sentences and become fluent communicators?  Is it a natural skill they acquire or do they need help?  Certainly children begin to learn to speak from the very day they are born.  However, it is up to parents, to make sure they provide the children with the very best opportunity to learn to speak and communicate well.

How do they learn?

• Talk To Them - A mother who chats to her baby from the very first day, while feeding or walking or changing the nappy, is doing a great job to encourage good spoken language.  Babies learn by hearing the spoken word and repeating and learning it for themselves.
• Show Them - Parents that discuss things in front of their children demonstrate the use of language and show the children how to discuss and communicate as adults.
• Play with Them - Have toy telephones to play with and set up pretend conversations.  Chat about all sorts of easy things and encourage chatter.
• Share with Them - Families that have discussions over a meal share in the joy of eating and talking.  Simply asking what happened at school or nursery today can be the simple question that leads to a great family chat!

Types of Language

By nine months, babies can understand simple words and commands ('stop', 'come here', etc.) even if they can't speak the words themselves. This is because there are 2 types of language knowledge: Receptive and Expressive language.  When we listen we use our receptive vocabulary, when we speak or write we use our expressive vocabulary.

A child's passive vocabulary is improved through continuous repetition of words and phrases.  Once repeated enough it becomes part of their passive vocabulary.  So, the active vocabulary can only be improved through use of the passive. A child has to hear a word 500 times before it becomes part of their active vocabulary, so a parent needs to speak as much as they can to their children and in front of their children.

Parenting is the most important job in the world, and yet we are supposed to do it without a definitive hand book and without a test run!  To make it even more confusing, exciting or scary (which ever way you look at it!) our babies and children don't have a manual either to work from either.

Parenting is different things to different people: it's not just telling off the children when they misbehave.  Parenting is a blend of the love, shelter, food, care, fun, teaching, learning, discipline and sharing you give your children.  It's also sharing with them your experience and wisdom, and  dealing with problems together.

It's not always easy to get parenting right.  An important element of parenting is disciplining your children and it's vital to be consistent over time and to follow up threats that you have to make.  If you threaten that you'll leave the playgroup if your little one keeps smacking another child, and they do it again, you must follow through the threat and leave.

The thing about parenting is that it's up to you!  However, it's worth taking a moment to think about your parenting style and perhaps assessing whether you might do things a bit differently.

Think about these questions:

• Overall, how would you describe your parenting style?  Are you a:-
  • Friend
  • Helper
  • Carer
  • Seargent Major?
• If you are offended, how do you react?  Do you:-
  
  • ...forgive if you get an apology?
  • ...ignore and keep the argument going?
  • ...get emotional and cry?
  • ...stand and fight and shout?
• How do you respond to the children bickering? Do you:-
  
  • ...shout at them and punish them?
  • ...explain the reasons to play nicely?
  • ...remind them of the rules?
  • ...respond quietly and calmly?
• What type of games to you like playing with your children?
  
  • Role play and acting?
  • Board games?
  • Hide and seek and physical games?
  • Do you have time to play games with them?

There are no right or wrong answers but we must be aware that parenting is something that involves us in more ways than one.  The children watch and learn form us even when we are not really aware of it.  So, if we respond to situations with a moody reaction, or if we shout when someone annoys us, our children learn this as the right course of action and will do the same.  Without necessarily realising it, our children are watching our behaviour and for them, what they see makes a far greater impression that what they are told!