When it comes to parenting, everyone does things differently, but there are four main styles of parenting that most of us fall into - what sort of parent are you?

Authoritative Parenting sees parents explaining rules and reasoning with their children, and explaining their expectations.  Parents will often forgive their children rather than punish them, but when they do punish, they explain why and take care that the child understands.  Parents accept age-appropriate behaviour but expect a level of maturity and in return, offer a level of independece.

Authoritarian Parenting takes a strict approach, requiring conformity to rules with parents demanding high expectations that their children may find difficult to fullfil.  Such parents may punish rather than reason with their children, and may be less open to understanding to the individual needs of children.

Permissive Parenting takes a more open approach to parenting, allowing children to express themselves as they wish, and giving them the freedom to do as they wish.  Parents are responsive to the needs of their children but do not enforce behaviour.  Children brought up in an indulgent way may find it difficult to accept authority later in their lives but at the same time, may adapt to independent life better than children parented in other ways.

Neglectful Parenting describes a much more hands-off approach where parents are disengaged from their children - they lack warmth and involvement in their childrens' daily lives.  They provide basic needs but neglect to nurture their children or offer the emotional support that other children enjoy.

Childminders also care in similar ways and for the best results, childminders should take on children who are being nurtured in a style similar to their own.  A sympathetic environment beyond their family life will help to comfort children rather than confuse them.  Similarly, if you are seeking a childminder for your children, try to identify your own style of parenting and look for a childminder that appears to work in a similar way.

Research has found that babies put into incubators when first born are less likely to develop depression as adults - something known as the incubator effect!

The findings suggest that babies put into an incubator when they are born are three times less likely to develop anxiety or depression in later life.  The results surprised the researchers, who expected to find that infants taken away from their mother so early, and placed in the incubator for long periods of time, would be more inclined to feel anxious and experience mental health problems when adults.   Separation at birth has always been considered a major contributing factor to behavioural problems in adolescence and adulthood.

The long term study took  a sample of 1,200 children, in Quebec, from 1986 through to 2006.  Full results were published in the medical journal, Psychiatric Research.  It may be due to the incubator having an impact on brain cell development or perhaps that poorly babies were given more close attention and care.

Interesting findings!

New, and slightly worrying research, suggests that having a healthy diet containinging plenty of fibre has a detrimental effect on your chances of having a baby. This is something women trying for a baby will be horrified to hear.

Wholemeal bread, brown pasta and brown rice when eaten in large quantities seem to effect the hormone levels of women and therefore may impact on fertility levels.  The more wholemeal food women ate, the lower the levels of vital hormones that influence the reproduction process.

The research was carried out in America, using a sample of 250 women of childbearing age, over a two year period.  They made two important discoveries when looking at the women and their fibre intake:

• Hormone levels were less in those with a high fibre diet
• There was an increase in something called anovulation (which is when a women goes through her menstrual cycle but her ovaries fail to release an egg)

Anovulation is known to occur when hormone levels drop due to anxiety, stress or extreme exercise.

This is the first time that a healthy diet has been deemed to impact on a person in a negative way.  Serious claims!

In the first few months following birth, your baby is experiencing the world through its senses, and it is those experiences that help form connections inside the brain and these connections that shape the individual mind of your baby.  At birth, a baby is barely able to see but they have an acute sense of smell.  At three days old they can recognise the smell of their mother's breast milk and the odour of their parents, yet they can still see only centimetres in front of them.  They have an innate ability to recognise faces and are attracted to faces close by.

By three months their brains have developed considerably and they are able to control themselves better - they can choose where to look rather than being fixated on moving objects nearby.  They might move their arms and legs seemingly randomly, but this is helping them to build up muscles, an essential component on the way to being able to roll, crawl and later walk.  This movement allows them to interact with their physical surroundings and this intensifies the rate at which the brain develops as it is exposed to new experiences.  Research shows that babies who are denied the opportunity to interact physically with their surroundings develop at a slower rate so it is particularly important to work with babies suffering physical or mental disability to ensure that they can develop as best they can.

Interacting with your baby is especially important even during these early months - try to spend time with your newborn baby stimulating them.  Stimulate their vision by exposing them to high contrast patterns and making movement in front of them; stimulate their hearing by playing background sounds and music, and rattling toys in front of them.  Stimulate their sense of feel by touching stroking them and letting them hold your fingers and baby toys.

It would be easy to ignore your newborn baby and leave them lying in another room for their first few months while you get on with the chores you have to do, but the more time you can spend with your baby, the more rewarding for both you and your little one!

Don't forget that here at ToucanLearn we have activities suitable from birth onwards.  Our early activities are simple and aimed at helping to stimulate early development in your child.  All our activities link into the Early Years Foundation Stage Areas of Learning and Development, so you can monitor that you are giving your baby a broad range of activities even at this early stage.

Doctors are being advised to take parent's fears seriously when it comes to sick children. A parent's instinct is to be considered and taken into account when diagnosing a sick child. The idea that "Mother knows best" may be laughed at by some professionals, but parents can offer important information when discussing their child and doctors should listen, according to research published in The Lancet.

Why should doctors listen to untrained, non-medical parents?

• A parent can be trusted to want the best for the child so are more likely to convey a concern if they think it's important.
• They have probably nursed their child before through other ailments.
• They know the child's 'normal' character and can tell when something is not right.

Previously a parent's view was not officially (or routinely) taken into account, but things may change and guidelines my encourage doctors to listen more to the parent; especially when it comes to serious childhood diseases.

Doctors themselves sometimes use 'gut feeling' for some diagnoses. Rapid detection of serious diseases (such as meningitis and pneumonia) can be vital and quick diagnoses can mean saving a life. If a parent's instinct says its serious, this could help get the child rushed into hospital for medical treatment.

Keep an eye out for:

• Rapid breathing
• High temperature
• Poor blood circulation to the skin especially on fingers and toes
• Lethargy and tiredness

If you feel you're not being heard by your doctor and that your concerns are not being taken seriously - GET A SECOND OPINION!

During their first years, the costs associated with having a new baby in the house are visible, but there are wider and longer term financial commitments that should be considered.

When babies are new, it seems they need lots of equipment and expensive stuff around the house.  The cot, the car seat, the chair, clothes, nappies, shoes.  Something you may get as gifts, other things you may have to save for.  One building Society estimated that the average family spends £132 a week on children.  Over an 18 year period, that is a staggering £123,500!  It's practically a house!

One survey said that the value of a Mum was... wait for it... £32,800 a year!  If only someone would pay that for our services!

But, there are ways of reducing the cost of a baby - it just takes a bit of planning and careful thinking.

1. Borrow or swap toys so you only have to buy one lot and your friend buys something else to share every few weeks.
2. Find out what is worth getting - speak to parents and discover which toys their kids like best.
3. Check out nearly new sales and boot sales for second hand toys.  You may be surprised at some of the bargains on offer.
4. Look at own brand vests, baby grows, nappies and wipes etc.
5. Breastfeed rather than buy formula - no waste and its fabulously free!
6. Get family and friends to buy practical presents.
7. Draw up a list of what you need and try not veer from that list.
8. Make sure you get all the benefits, maternity pay and awards that you are entitled to.  Remember to register for child benefit, tax credits and  working tax credits.  A little research could make a real difference to what you are paid.
9. Claim your Child Trust Fund money and invest carefully.

Shapes and colours are amongst the first concepts that babies learn and learning them helps to stimulate connections in the brain that will continue to serve your baby as they learn throughout their childhood.  Learning both shapes and colours with your baby can be fun for both of you.  Here's a fun idea on how to familiarise your baby with both.

Take two potatoes and cut them in half so that at least one of the cross sections makes a circle.  Now carve the other faces into a rectangle, square and triangle. You now have four large stampers!

Dip the face of the potatoes in finger paint and stamp different coloured shapes onto a large sheet of paper.  Practice the stamping and discuss each shape with your baby - count the sides on the shape and point your finger around each shape as you show them.  Start with a single colour and state the colour with each stamp: 'red circle', 'red square', 'red triangle', 'red rectangle'.  Wipe the paint off the face each time and then start on another colour.

When you have played with these for a bit, show the effect of mixing colours; demonstrate how two colours mixed together create a different colour.  Try mixing various combinations of colours to create a varied array.

Playing with shapes and colours will help to cement these concepts in your child's mind and start them on a learning path that will set them up well for school in a few years!

It's never too early to introduce your toddlers to science - you don't call it science, of course, but there are plenty of fun activities that you can do to help build an understanding of the world around them.  Here are a few ideas:-

Weather: Create a series of card pictures for different types of weather, and a picture for each of the seasons.  Each morning look at the weather and put the appropriate weather and season pictures up on the wall.

Faces: Create a large picture of a head and then create a series of different eyes, noses, mouths, ears, eyebrows, hair and pairs of glasses.  Have your toddler create faces, placing features in the right place.  Discuss different coloured eyes, different shaped features and talk about what glasses are for.

Planting: Buy some cress or mung beans, plant them in a plastic pot, water them and watch them grow.  Have your child chart the progress each day as they germinate and shoot up.  Discuss the ways that they change each day, draw how they look and at the end, make a sandwich and enjoy them!  Talk about how healthy they are and that good food makes you grow.

Colours: Show how mixing finger paints creates different colours.  Create swirling patterns on paper by pouring on generous amounts of paint and swirling with your finger.

Growing: Use a wall to mark the height of your children.  Have them stand against the wall, make a pencil mark at the height they stand and measure how tall they are.  Add a date, and repeat on the first day of each month.  Sometimes you'll see almost no difference, other months you might notice change.  Over a prolonged time you will see how they grow.  Discuss what makes you grow and the concept that your little ones are growing into big children.

These are just a few ideas, there are hundreds more activities that you can undertake with your toddlers to get them used to the concepts of science, and to spark an interest in the world around them.

Children learn so many new words and concepts in their first few years, parts of the body are just some of the more complicated words they have to understand - why not teach them through songs?  There are lots of songs that help learn parts of the body, and you can make up or use established actions with all of them to help your babies remember all these funny words.

The Hokey Cokey (or Hokey Pokey as it's known in the USA) teaches arms and legs as well as basic moves and coordination.  Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes teaches those, as well as facial features ('eyes, and ears, and mouth and nose...').  Here we go round the Mulberry Bush has subsequent verses: 'This is the way we wash our hands...', 'This is the way we brush our teeth', and 'This is the way we brush our hair'. You can easily add in new verses to teach more too, as you can with 'If you're happy and you know it...' which also teaches parts of the body with matching actions.

Here's another great example, why not follow the Tweenies with this song?!

Your baby can learn parts of their body well before they are able to talk.  There's nothing more rewarding than being able to show off your baby responding to commands such as 'Where's your nose?', 'Where are your ears?' and 'Where's your mouth?'!

The Baby Show commissioned research into the patterns around conception for 1,000 babies, their findings were interesting, but don't concur entirely with our own information!  You can read the full article here; it produces some fun facts such as that last year 20% of conceptions were unplanned and that nearly half the respondents conceived outside of the bedroom!

Their research also suggests that April is the most popular month to conceive in, and September the least popular.  Well, we have a data sample just shy of 3,000 children (but growing daily!) which agrees that April is the most popular month, by a considerable margin.  However, trailing as the least popular month in our data is July - our data places September right in the middle as a pretty average month!

It's all a bit of fun and we're sure you will find lots more interesting things at the next Baby Show which falls on 19th - 21st February at ExCeL in London.

We are all so conscious of dangers when we take children out: cars on the road, tripping on pavements, falling from a swing.  However there are 400 children admitted to hospital every WEEK with injuries following accidents in the home.  This is a staggering number - especially when this is just those under the age of five!

What we have to remember is that children and toddlers and babies are constantly growing and experimenting and exploring.  The way they learn is to watch and copy us.  So, we need only take a look through their eyes to see what they might see and then we'll realise how accidents - that are totally avoidable - can happen.  And, we'll see how easy it is to prevent those accidents taking place.

Tablets and pills - many toddlers can take off the child-resistant caps on bottles of pills. The child-resistant caps make it more difficult to open, but are not impenetrable for a child.  A simple adult painkiller could poison a child.  They see you take a few, and it helps your headache.  If they get hold of them, they take a few and it could be disastrous.  Toddlers may think they are sweets, that they taste nice, that Daddy has them so why shouldn't I, that they make them grow strong.  So, keep bottles of pills well out of reach. 

Lighters and matches - children can ignite lighters by accident and can cause a match to inflame by just playing with them  They don't realise the danger they could cause.  There are 6,000 house fires every year caused by children under ten!  When they look at a match or lighter, children see the flash of light, the spark, it's like magic.  Keep the matches and lighters out of reach.

Stairs - About 800 under fives are taken to hospital each WEEK having fallen down stairs.  They develop the climbing skills need to get up stairs very quickly... almost without you noticing they could suddenly be able to get up a few steps. It can be dreadfully dangerous if they fall down.  Kids think its fun to go up, it's a challenge and everyone else does it so why shouldn't I?  Well, if they do they might fall and hurt themselves, get a stair gate and remember to use it!

Knives and utensils in the kitchen - It's so easy to forget that little ones can one day reach kitchen surfaces.    Make sure all knives, and heavy utensils are well back just in case they reach up and something comes crashing down.

Hot Drinks - tea and coffee can scald and burn a baby's skin.  Don't put hot drinks on low tables or on unstable surfaces.  Tea and coffee is made with boiling water and stays hot for a long time.  If they they go to try your tea without you seeing, and pour it over themselves by accident - it could scar your child for life!

It's not all gloom and doom!  But being very aware of potential dangers is vital in order for you and your child to have a relaxed home!  If you make just a few changes to the way you do things and if you just keep one step ahead if you can... you'll be okay!

A few final tips:

1. Fit a smoke alarm and TEST it frequently.
2. Keep all medicines, cleaning fluids in a locked cupboard out of a child's reach.
3. Fit stair gates and safety guards round fires.
4. Keep hot drinks on tables that are out of reach.  Don't drink hot tea with your baby in your arms.
5. Keep saucepan handles, electric flexes etc well out of reach.

Music is an important part of a baby's development but at different stages in their early life it can be used in different ways.

Newborns love music played softly.  Prepare a nice warm room, cuddle up with your baby and put on some lovely relaxing music.  Rock slightly to the rhythm and enjoy some quiet, peaceful time together.

3-6 month old babies love looking at you and your face so this is a great time to introduce singing to your little one.  They will enjoy hearing your voice (no matter how good or bad you are at singing!) and will love to be near your face as you sing.  Perhaps tap the beat of the music gently on their feet too!

6-9 month old babies are looking for a little more stimulation so this is a good time to introduce actions to your songs and rhymes.  Gently hold their hands and guide their arms through the songs.  Bounce them on your knee in time with the music and perhaps introduce puppets or teddies that dance along to the music too!

9-12 month old babies will be able to hold rattles and instruments when they are doing their 'singing'.  Get hold of some nice bells or wooden rattles and shake in time with the music.  See if baby can copy the sounds you make when you sing or the sounds the instruments make. Don't forget to have a dance around together to music.  Sway, bounce, and even jig if you feel like it!

12-18 month olds will enjoy moving around a little more to music.  Play all sorts of music - not just kiddie songs.  Put on your favourite tracks and see how your little ones like it.  Do some fast dancing, or slow dancing too.  And, don't forget to have some relaxing time together too.  Listen to the music in a comfy chair and have some down time.

Have fun and enjoy yourselves!

According to many music teachers, starting formal music lessons too early is a sure way to put a child off learning to play, but how do you know when your child is ready to learn something?  It seems the overriding answer is that it should be child-led.  If they show an aptitude, an interest or ask for lessons, then it may be time to consider it.

However, before they start they need to be able to recognise numbers and understand the alphabet from A-G.  They also need to be physically able to hold an instrument or press hard enough to close valves etc.  In addition, they need to be mature enough to be able to concentrate during a lesson.

What to start with:

Recorder - a common and popular first instrument.  Its a great springboard to other wind instruments and children can start as soon as they have long enough fingers to cover the holes.  It's light, easy to carry around and can make some nice noises!

Piano - as soon as your little one can reach the keys, they can start playing the piano.  Groups lessons can be great fun and rewarding to young children.

String instruments - these come in various sizes to suit children.  A violin sized 1/8 is suitable for a child aged 4 - 6 years, the ideal age to start learning violin is six.

Wind and brass instruments - these need to be tackled by older children once their second set of teeth are through.  The pressure put on the teeth can cause damage.  They also need to be old enough to hold the instrument and blow.  Puff is essential!

Before you sign up for any lessons, chat to the teacher about it at length and, just as important, chat to other parents.  Make sure your child is serious but even so consider hiring an instrument rather than buying just in case!  Music is a vital part of our lives and our culture and can be an inspirational source of delight for children.  We need, however, to be careful how much we encourage (or 'push') our children when they are little.  Having fun with music, singing together, saying rhymes and just enjoying music itself is more important than being the first child in school to be playing a violin.  It could put off a potentially talented young musician.

Research has found that people are more likely to wash their hands after going to the toilet, if they think that someone else is watching them - if no one is looking, they'll not bother!  The research was carried out by the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine.  They set up sensors in toilets and were able to study the behaviour of 250,000 people.  They found that less than one third of men washed with hands with soap but nearly two thirds of women did.

Why bother washing your hands? As you go through the day touching surfaces and objects, germs accumulate on your hands.  You can infect yourself by touching your own eyes, nose or mouth.  Washing your hands with soap can minimise the spread of bacteria.

When to wash your hands:

1. Before preparing food.
2. Before eating.
3. Before and after treating wounds or giving medicine. A
4. After using the toilet.
5. After changing a baby's diaper/nappy.
6. After touching animals.
7. After emptying the rubbish or touching  something that could be contaminated like muddy shoes.
8. PLUS, wash them whenever they look dirty!

Here are the steps required to give them a thorough wash and reduce risk of infection from bacteria:-

1. Wet hands with running water.
2. Apply anti-bacterial  liquid soap.
3. Lather and rub hands for 15 seconds.
4. Rinse and dry well.

Encourage little ones to wash frequently too.  Show them what to do and lead by example by always washing your hands too!  It will become second nature and you could be doing them a huge favour when it comes to avoiding contagious illnesses!

If you're expecting your first baby, you probably don't know what to expect - here are some of the essentials that you'll need as soon as your baby is born!

• Car seat: this is the single most important item because unless you live next to the hospital or are having a home birth, you won't be able to bring your baby home without a car seat. Safety equipment is best bought new because you don't know the history of second hand items. Make sure that the seat is properly fitted and that you are familiar with how to insert and release your baby's seat prior to the birth.
• Diapers/nappies: Whether you decide to use disposable or cloth nappies, you'll need a plentiful supply as soon as your baby is home. A changing mat is useful but not essential as you can use towels to begin with.
• Crib or cot: you'll want a bed for your baby as soon as he or she comes home. It's a good idea for babies to sleep in your bedroom for the first few months but not in your bed because there's a high risk that you might accidentally smother your baby. Have a crib, moses basket or cot ready.
• Clothes: a plentiful supply of clothes is needed. You should have clothing ready with you in the hospital - vests, babygrows or onesies, cardigans, socks and mittens will give you a choice of clothing and layers. Hospitals usually recommend a hat to keep the head warm.
• Bottle and formula: Even if you are intending to breastfeed it is a good idea to have a suitable bottle and formula ready just in case there are problems that prevent you from being able to feed your baby at any time during the first few weeks.

Don't panic if you get home and suddenly realise that there's something you have forgotten to stock in advance. You'll probably be able to get hold of most essential equipment or clothes from your nearest supermarket, even if it means asking friends or family to run an errand for you!